Our Southern Christmas

Christmas is over and it is time to reflect. We broke tradition in several ways this year. The biggest was we were out of state…we went to Tennessee to be with our son and daughter in law for the Holiday. We left and came home to snowstorms, but not bad for Michigan. We also gave my stepmom a ride down to Kentucky to see that part of the family. We left on Tuesday, the twenty second, with only a quick stop at Ter’s office to take care of some business. Then it was south through Indiana stopping in Anderson for the night. After an early start we met up with the Kentucky branch of the family to have lunch and put my stepmom safely in their care. Then it was off for the last leg of the trip to Smyrna and the “kids” house. We thought about pulling over at Opry Mills Mall to see the lights, but quickly decided that was a bad idea when we saw the crowds and traffic. We finished up our Christmas shopping at other stores . One of the best parts was we had been able to abandon our winter coats by the time we got to Kentucky. The temperatures were in the fifties, not the twenties! We all went out for a quick supper and came home to relax.
The next morning, Christmas Eve, we were able to go to a local park and take a walk. That wouldn’t be as easy in Michigan. Later on Pat and Myla went to church while we stayed home and watched an old classic movie, “The Bells of St. Mary’s” and then “A Charlie Brown Christmas.” It was a fairly early bedtime, which was OK after the hectic times of the days before we left.
Christmas morning we all got up, had a delicious breakfast, and then opened our gifts. I got a personalized coat for our Wood Badge Course, “The Last Lecture” by Randy Pausch ( a great book which my first copy was passed on to someone else at our Wood Badge Patrol Christmas party), a new LL Bean Fleece, some hand crème (sorely needed with the way my hands dry out from washing) and all were greatly appreciated. We had a great dinner and relaxed. We did go to the Opryland Hotel and Convention Center to see the light display. I had heard it was really great. It definitely met expectations and I managed to get some good pictures, even with my phone camera. I didn’t like having to go through the crowds, but it was worth it. We all stopped at an Irish style pub which had a small Irish band entertaining. They were really good and our meals were good, but PRICEY!! Ah, not to be unexpected when you are in a “tourist trap” type place and there is a college bowl game in a couple of days.
The next day we took a ride around the area while the “kids” started their shopping for NEXT Christmas. There were some good deals out there. We ended up in the town of Franklin, about twenty miles from Smyrna, while looking at houses and property. We saw a sign for Carnton Plantation and that they were open for tours. It is a very interesting historical place. It was used as a hospital for the Confederate wounded in the battle of Franklin, which only lasted four or five hours. It was short, but several thousand were wounded or killed including four Confederate generals. When walking through the house, especially by any windows, you can still see the blood stains in the wood flooring from the wounded who were treated there. The McGavocks, owners of the plantation, gave much besides the use of their home for literally months while the soldiers recovered. They tore up their clothes to use as bandages, fed the wounded, but also donated acres of land to be used as a burial ground. It is still the biggest privately owned military cemetery in the nation. People are still coming to find their ancestors who are buried there. When the person could be identified, the McGavocks kept meticulous records which are still being used today. But the thing which affected me the most was to walk into the one slave quarters which is still in existence. The difference between the opulence of the house and the quarters could not have been more stark. According to the information, the quarters we walked through was one of the better ones used by the house slaves. They were given higher esteem than the ones who worked in the fields who lived in log cabins, not the brick type building we walked through. It was something to hear the history of the Civil War from the Southern perspective, which was different then what I heard in school. I also thought about that time of brother fighting brother and people being treated as less than human.
After getting “home”, we had a dinner of delicious left overs and spent the evening playing Yahtzee. It was a good time and good conversation. I even surprised myself by coming in second place. A big surprise after not playing the game is such a long time.
I’ll finish the story of our trip in my next post……

Choices, Choices

I’m sitting here at the keyboard on a snowy, December Saturday morning thinking about how to fit everything in. There is much to do with decorating, various Christmas celebrations, along with other things. A week ago last Friday is an example. There were at least two places we could have been with our church Christmas banquet and a Court of Honor celebrating a young man from our Troop earning his Eagle Scout rank. We did settle on the Court of Honor. It is always a great time seeing these young men come to the end of a long journey to earn this coveted rank. You enjoy it as they bring family into the celebration and other people who have meant much to them.
Now it is time to make another choice… there are three places I could have been one day this past weekend and the choice was not easy. First there was a luncheon meeting of my dwarfism support group. These are a great bunch of ladies and I don’t really get to see much of them because of other commitments. I enjoy the camaraderie with them as we discuss the triumphs and challenges of living with our condition. The next is a meeting of my Wood Badge patrol for a Christmas celebration and time of encouragement. I decided on these two events as I still had to make cookies to serve after the children’s program at church. The third was our annual time of helping a family member decorate their house for the season. I could have tried for all three but it would be an incredible strain on time and effort. I’m not getting any younger and my body won’t take what it used to along with it seems there are more and more demands on time. The choices were made easier when the time of decorating was moved up a day. I still had another demand on that day!
It is all too easy to make these decisions very difficult by turning them every which way and worrying about people’s reactions. I have been guilty of this for most of my life. I don’t want to upset people so I try to please. The problem with this is you can not possibly please everyone. There is always someone who will disagree with what you decide. I am slowly and painfully coming to the conclusion you just have to make a decision and go with it. There are times people will just have to understand it is your life and you have to live it. This may sound kind of harsh, but you will drive yourself insane trying to go along with everyone’s wishes. I will try to start working on this concept, and it will most likely take awhile!!
Another choice made is we are heading for Tennessee for Christmas. This decision was a little easier as we are heading for Pat and Myla’s house. I am eager to see what Nashville looks like all dolled up for Christmas and if the street corners will still have people playing and singing their hearts out with their instrument cases open for any donations. It will certainly be warmer down there. We will have seen Tennessee in all four seasons. Best of all we will be spending some time with our dear loved ones. It will certainly add to the season being so different this year. Life keeps changing as the years go by and therefore the choices we make. It will be hard being away from the family here, for sure. I am relating more and more to my brothers decision to move closer to his family. God help all of us with our decisions!!

The Holidays Are Here

The holidays are coming very quickly. Choir practices for Christmas musicals, planning Thanksgiving dinner, planning family get togethers for Christmas, gift purchases, sending out cards and all else which comes up to end another year. It is always a hectic time and you wonder if you will get through it.
Don’t get me wrong, I do like the holidays. It is always a great time of celebrating the birth of our Savior. Where would we be without that blessed birth? We would not be where we are for those of us who are Christians. I never tire of the story of His Coming. It is so full of miracles beginning with the Immaculate Conception and the angel’s announcement to Mary and Joseph being told in a dream. It is also full of simple things like his birth in a stable, not exactly what we think of now with the sterile birthing rooms including the doctors, nurses, and a lot of the time family is also present. Would most people in these days be willing to lay their new born child in the manger where the animals ate? Not highly likely with all the focus on cleanliness nowadays. Christ came quietly into this world with only his parents and the animals after being refused space in any inn in Bethlehem. It wasn’t until later other people came to acknowledge His birth beginning with the shepherds who were told by the angels as found in Luke Chapter two. Then followed the Magi, or wise men from the east, bearing their expensive gifts of gold, frankincense, and myrrh. In some ways I wish we could concentrate on these things. Our schedules around this time of year become full of the things I mentioned before. You look at the calendar and wonder how can fit one more thing in.
This is where you have to determine you WILL have a time of quiet where you do concentrate on the simple things, on God’s wonderful gift of the season and what He did for all of us. You may have to hide your cell phone, computer, and other electronic gadgets to accomplish this but it will be worth it in calming your soul and finding a time of peace during this season. I have often thought about what God must think about what we have turned this time of the year into with the never ending ads for the “perfect gift” for loved ones while battling the crowds at the store to find it. Along with the making sure things are perfect when friends and family come over, decorating our homes and all the rest. The classic special for the season, “A Charlie Brown Christmas”, comes to mind where Charlie is searching for the true meaning of Christmas. Nothing is going right for Charlie and there is little cooperation from the other kids as they prepare the annual Christmas pageant. Finally in utter frustration Charlie throws up his hands and declares, “Is there anyone who can tell me what Christmas is all about!?” Linus, blanket in hand, comes out and says, “I can Charlie Brown”, and proceeds to recite the Christmas story from the Book of Luke, chapter two. When finished Linus states simply, “That’s what Christmas is really all about, Charlie Brown.” The story in all its simplicity is what matters.
In the midst of all the hubbub, take time to sit back with a cup of your favorite tea or coffee, Bible in hand, and reread the Christmas story in one of the Gospels. Take the time to reflect on the true meaning for the season and have a grateful heart. I enjoy watching others opening their gifts and enjoy opening mine and greatly appreciate them all but keep the simple story in mind.

Catch Up Time

It has been number of weeks since I have written on here. It has been a busy time as usual with the October Scout training blitz and other things. I did kind of regret bowing out of helping with one of the training sessions, in fact, one of the biggest which happens during the year, Pow-Wow. This is an all day affair with many classes happening to give Cub Scout leaders ideas to take back to their units. It is a very full day. The alarm clock “blinks” (I use a flashing light alarm as I can’t hear a regular alarm) all too early so we can arrive in Muskegon for set up. Terry and I have done Den Chief training for a number of years which teaches Scouts to help out with Cub Scout dens by leading games, songs, helping with keeping order during meetings and other things. This also helps them get some of the leadership position time they need to get their Eagle rank.
This year I chose, with Ter’s encouragement, to once again attend the “Breathe” Christian writer’s conference. It was once again an enjoyable experience and I got much more out of it this year than last. I left about 10:30 Friday morning so I could have time to check into my hotel before heading for the church where the conference was held. I had a good experience with this particular hotel last year so I reserved a room again. When I got my belongings up to the room I was greatly surprised to find I had an even nicer room than last year. It was huge with a nice desk, very large bed, and a couch. After getting my things settled I headed south of town to the church to make it in time for the welcoming session. There were a number of books given away, with a lot of mention of C.S. Lewis. I’ll have to catch up on my reading of his works. They are really Christian classics. Then our breakout sessions began. There was a lot of good advice on getting your writing career started. We had a break and I was late for my next session which was about building suspense in your writing. The authors, who are husband and wife, write more adventure thriller type books using their law enforcement careers as background. You can use the advice from the suspense workshop for almost any type of writing to keep your readers interested. I did buy two of their books. Then it was off to supper.
After supper we had our keynote address from the man who helped write, “Ninety Minutes in Heaven.” This is a very exciting book giving people the story of a man who actually was declared dead for ninety minutes after a horrific accident. He gives a vivid description of his time in Heaven. The author gave insight into his time of being a “ghost writer” or being the one actually writing the book for someone else versus writing where taking full credit for all aspects of a book. It was very interesting. After a short discussion time, it was back to the hotel for the evening. The next day was full of workshops. I especially enjoyed the humor writing session. The time went quickly. We ended with the authors answering our questions during a panel discussion. It was very interesting, particularly the discussion on using the networking site, Facebook. Some were really against using it, others saw it as a valuable tool. They really left it up to each person to make up their mind on the subject. They didn’t mince any words about the ups and downs of publishing. After this it was time to head for home. I had checked out of the hotel before coming to the last day of the conference. I will confess to wishing I could have stayed another night just to get my thoughts together about the conference instead of having to jump right back into “normal” life. I really understand authors getting a hotel room and cloistering themselves away to write. There are many distractions at home with just day to day life with cooking, cleaning, and other activities. There was much encouragement from all of the authors. My only regret is I didn’t get any of my writings printed off of my computer to bring for evaluation. I also wish I had a laptop computer to write when I am away from home with so many hotels having internet access.
It has been back to things as normal. One thing that has really jumped out at me is how the Lord seems to be speaking to me about my tendency to beat myself down all the time. This seems especially true of the book we are studying for our ABF (Adult Bible Fellowship) right now. We are using the book “Having a Mary Spirit” by Joanna Weaver in our class and I would recommend it to any woman. It book encouraging all to truly surrender to the Lord’s leading in all areas of life. All too often we allow the weight of the world to pull us away from true commitment to Christ, just allowing Him to lead us in all ways. I want to stop the self flagellation for every little mistake and the reliving of them. This book is a great follow-up to “Having a Mary Heart in a Martha World” also by Joanna Weaver. This book takes its basis from the story of Jesus coming to visit the home of Mary and Martha (Luke 10: 38-42). Martha complains to Jesus about Mary not helping with all the meals and other preparations. Instead Mary is spending her time at the feet of Christ learning from Him. Christ tells Martha she is too worried about the physical preparations for things and Mary has chosen the better thing to sit at His feet and learn. The book discusses the way things are now with our busyness of having our schedules full to the maximum of accomplishing things. We should have our time of just focusing on Christ and His Word. We are all under pressure to keep moving, cram one more thing into our waking hours. We need our time to think about Christ and let Him permeate our thoughts and spirits. We should feel absolutely no guilt about taking this time for Him. I will confess to when I read my Bible in the morning I usually jump right up and get to work so breakfast will be ready so Ter can go to work. I should just sit quietly and consider the passage I have just read, pray and truly commit the day to God for His Glory. Instead it is jump up, start breakfast, pack Ter’s lunch on the days he goes to Lansing, and get right to it for the day. I don’t know if I’ll have to start getting up a little earlier to accomplish this but I’m sure my day would be much more fulfilling putting it in HIS hands.

Winter Is Coming

It is a rainy, dreary October day. The corn is being picked by our renters and the Farmers Markets are getting ready to close which means the growing season is coming to an end. It is also time to start preparing for the winter season. One of the bigger jobs is putting up the snow fence. This is where you strategically place fencing so the snow will pile up there instead of in the driveway. This makes keeping the driveway clear a much easier job. We still have to replace the tractor which is now in Florida. It truly made my brother’s retirement hit home when he pulled in, loaded the BN on the trailer and headed out. I am praying we find one pretty soon as our storage clients are coming in for the season. Our storage people arriving becomes another indication of the impending change of seasons. It is a fact of life in Michigan. We have very definitive season changes. We also put plastic over the windows to help with keeping the heat in and cold out. It is always kind of a sad day when it goes up as you loose part of the clarity of seeing outside.
Winter used to be one of my favorite seasons as a kid. Getting the “Flying Saucers”, toboggan , and skis out was enjoyed by all three of us. Sometimes we would go slightly down the road, climb the fence, and go sliding on the hill at the neighbors which we saw as much better than the hills at home. You could go faster and farther because the hill was steeper. You did have to look out so you didn’t land in the creek. That would have been a very COLD experience. Sometimes we could even talk Mom into making hot chocolate for us when we would come in. It wasn’t the instant kind most of us think of today. Mom would warm up the milk, add coco, sugar, and vanilla for a great treat. We would always ask if there were marshmallows to make it even tastier.
Another winter job was digging out the driveway. I personally didn’t end up doing too much of it with my brothers ending up with that work. I would try and help out where I could. When we bought the tractor that could handle a snow plow we kids all thought that was great. The job could be done much faster and easier, not to mention the fact we didn’t have to go outdoors and face the cold. Sometimes we would even ride along when Daddy would go to plow out the grandparents driveways. Later on Daddy bought a snow blower for the big tractor but it ended up not getting much use as most of the time the snow was too wet or heavy for it to do a good job. I try to help out once in awhile nowadays but I can’t run the snow blower so a shovel is the tool for me. I will confess that moving south to be by our son and daughter in law sounds good for the simple fact of NOT having to shovel the white stuff. Of course there are other reasons the thought of moving is appealing. Those are for another time.
As the growing season comes to an end, I think ahead to the months where the farm land will get a little rest. Even the winter wheat lies dormant during the winter. God allows for a rest period so the land can recover for another year of use. I sometimes wonder if the farmers still allow some fields to lie unused for a year, but I’m thinking they don’t as they want to keep every acre as productive as possible. There are times we, as people, need seasons of rest and rejuvenation. God even took a day of rest after finishing creating the world and its inhabitants. The Bible tells us he saw it as “Good”. We don’t see Sunday as a day of rest like we used to in years past. Stores and restaurants are open, and other activities are planned pretty much like it is any other day of the week. We cram our lives as full as possible. In some ways you long for the days where Sunday was seen as a different day even by those who don’t accept the Christian faith. We need to get back to having a time of rest for many reasons. This hustle and bustle, always connected world wears on us. It is easy to see why people can have such a hard time to be “still and know that I am God.” You have to hide all your electronic devices and at times shut off the ringer on your phones to kind of hide from the world. May God teach us how to quiet our lives once more to rest in Him and refresh ourselves.

Mackinac Island...here we come

One more time into a packed vehicle for a weekend Scout event. Although, this one wasn’t for purposes of training. Every other year there is a Council wide event called Mackinac Rendezvous where Scouts from all over our Council are invited to come up north to camp on the mainland and then a day over on beautiful , historic Mackinac Island. The Scouts can work on different Merit Badges while on the Island and drink in some of the sights and sounds….and let’s not forget scarfing down some of the delicious fudge which is made by the shops. It is quite an event with the number of Scouts and leader around 1,500 people.
The logistics for this make it so many people are needed to keep things running…130 people were on staff this time. We were part of the “physical arrangements” team. Our job was to check the units in, lead them to their camp sites,and get them to unload their gear and move their vehicles to the parking area upon arrival. The units had from 3 PM until Midnight to arrive and then the security team would take over to get them in place. Things went fairly quickly. The day was cold and blustery with the wind off of the big lake so we were well bundled. As the sun fell it became even colder and we were all thankful for the propane powered lamp which not only gave light but much needed heat. We passed the time by answering questions about Scout history in our little booklet with the schedule for events and other information about what would be going on for the weekend. Our last people arrived about 11 PM and we went back to the cozy cabin for the evening….the warmth was greatly appreciated. No camping this time!! I will admit to having three or four layers of clothes on to keep warm while we were at our check in station. It would be a short night before our next duties came in the morning.
After a quick breakfast it was time to walk around our area to make sure the Scouts and leaders were up and moving to be down to the area where we would meet our busses for transportation to the boats docks for the trip to the Island for the day. This is where our positions on staff came in kind of handy. We were allowed to cut the line to get on the boats. It was a quick trip to the Island and a very pleasant surprise when we spotted a former Scout on the Island for a political convention. We had a good conversation catching up with how he was doing. It was then off to do some geocacheing for the morning. Ter and I have been on the Island a number of times and know famous Main Street pretty well. We were with some other Scout friends and found one cache. We walked a little while longer and found another one along a board walk. It was a nice walk back downtown as one of my friends had to lead a group to teach them about geocacheing.
I met back up with Ter and we decided to go up the hill for lunch at Fort Mackinac, the focal point of the Island. This fort has a very interesting history which includes it being transported across the Straits of Mackinac from Mackinaw City and rebuilt. The Fort was under the flag of several different nations including France, England, and finally the United States during its active days. It was lost to the British in one of the first battles of the War of 1812 without a single shot being fired. It was surrendered when the commander realized the American troops were vastly outnumbered by the British and Native Americans. It was eventually taken back and was an American post until being decommissioned in 1895.. I found out the hard way I can’t make it up the ramp to the Fort as easily as I used to in the past. I actually had to stop and rest as the incline of the ramp is fairly severe. We made it up and headed for the restaurant. I got to the head of the steps and had an “Oh, Oh” moment. I really took my time getting down the steps and was glad to set down at a table and order lunch. We did linger for a little while. We had hoped to get the delicious roast turkey leg dinner we remembered from a previous trip but such was not the case.
But one of the things you notice the most is the quiet…no motorized vehicles are allowed except for emergency ones. Horses and bicycles are the basic transportation for the Island which also makes for having to remember watching out for the inevitable results of using animals. We left lunch and decided to do a little geocacheing. This is a kind of high tech “treasure hunt” where people hide things, publish the coordinates on a website where you can download them, and you go and hunt for them. You certainly don’t get rich, but have a lot of fun and get some exercise walking in the woods. Then sadly it was time to head back downtown to buy the fudge we had promised our neighbors for keeping and eye on “Tippy, the wonder mutt” for the third weekend out of the last six. We appreciate them so much for doing it…although Tippy usually isn’t a whole lot of problem.
It was cut the line one more time for the trip back across the Straits so we could help do crowd control one more time. There was a catered meal for all, to me quite a feat with 15 or 1600 people. Things were done pretty efficiently and there was time for all to just wander another historic fort for awhile. This one is Fort Michilimacinac. This is one from the 1700’s and actually was captured by American Indians who fooled the residents while playing a game of lacrosse. I’ll leave you to study the history of this unique place. We had a program inside the fort celebrating the upcoming 100th anniversary of American Scouting and then it was back to our campground.
Our last job for the event was to check out the units we had checked in on Friday. This went much quicker as people wanted to get back on the road home. We had to check their camp sites for cleanliness and then could give them their slips to go get their vehicles and load up. This was accomplished in about two hours. We then went to help out with finishing tearing down what we had put up around the campground to accommodate all the people. We changed out of our uniforms for the trip home. We crossed the Mighty Mac to go into St. Ignace to have lunch at a little unique restaurant called Java Joe’s. It is unique as when you walk in it looks like you are in the Florida keys with the décor. Even the owner looks like someone right from the Keys with his long ponytail and brightly colored shirts. Then it was hit the road for home only stopping to do some more “treasure hunting”. We did run into some construction which made for an interesting side trip. We made it home about 7 PM and did some basic unloading of the car and were ready for some rest. My bet is we’ll be back for the next Rendezvous to help out.

All I can say is....WOW

We are back home and it is time to reflect on another full weekend of Wood Badge training. My body is still recovering for sure. It was also an emotional time. I know this blog will be difficult for those not in Scouting to understand, but this was such a moving weekend I have to write about it.
It began Thursday evening. Several members of our Patrol had decided to arrive early, once again to avoid an early morning wake up call, long drive and a full day of training. It was a time to just sit down, talk, and get to know each other. I was glad Ter stuck around to help put up my “home” for the weekend as we had borrowed a tent so we would have two for the weekend as we are in different Patrols within the Troop of Wood Badge. We put it up pretty quickly so Ter could get over to his campsite to put up his place for the weekend. After a fitful sleep, due to the fact I don’t hear much with my hearing aids out, I woke up to the bright screen of my cell phone alarm. I had brought a second alarm to help, although it was pretty iffy it would wake me up as it was a regular alarm. The worry was waking up on time….although my Patrol would have made sure I was up. I was glad the screen on my phone did the job. The rest of our Patrol would arrive in a little bit to set up for the weekend.
After setting up camp we went to Gilwell Park to have our opening ceremony for the weekend. It was very moving as we honored the victims of 9/11. We lowered the flags to half staff and each individual patrol did a one minute salute to honor the many who lost their lives that horrific day. It brought tears to my eyes to think of the loss to so many. From there it became kind of a whirlwind of learning about leadership and how it relates to Scouting. We hurried back to our campsite for a quick lunch and back to work. We regathered to have Patrol and Course pictures taken. Afterward it was a quick trip back to the campsite to get out of our Class A uniforms because of the heat. There was another presentation and we proceeded to planned team building games. This is where I found out the hard way I hadn’t eaten enough at lunch. A little over half way through there was a feeling of , “oh, oh where am I”, which is never a good thing. My sugar was crashing along with some dehydration coming on. One of my fellow Patrol members saw what was going and and told me not to lock my knees as I looked like I was going to pass out. Thank you, fellow high flying Eagle! The person leading the game told me to get some water from his bottle. I finished up that game and thankfully the next game was a sit down one in the shade. The last game I started to pass out again, but was then reminded I had some candy in my pocket and got some water. That little bit of sugar got me through to suppertime. The day ended with a great firebowl program with all Patrols participating. We finished up the day and kind of fell into bed. I don’t know about my fellow Eagles but it took awhile for my mind to settle down.
Then too quickly came Saturday morning when we had to be up and moving so we could be to Gilwell again for the flag raising ceremony scheduled for 7:30. I turned over my Patrol Leader responsibilities to the next person. After the morning sessions and lunch, each Patrol did a fifteen minutes presentation. Ours happened to be on hypothermia and went over quite well. We were finally able to work on the biggest part, our tickets. These are tasks we each choose and have approved to complete to get our beads…the ultimate goal of Wood Badge. These can be a challenge to write up. Our battle was finally won, though. Throughout the day our plan to have campfire and cracker barrel with the Patrol sharing our campsite grew until EVERYONE in the course was invited. It was a very emotional time as each person spoke about their time at Wood Badge.
Sunday was tear down the camp time. I kind of surprised myself as I took down the tent. The only thing I needed help with was getting the tent folded and put in the bag to go home. A great thanks goes to another member of my Patrol for helping with that part of taking down the site. Our things were then hauled down to the parking lot and put in our vehicles for the trip home. A ride down to the parking lot was greatly appreciated!! Then came chapel which this time was run by the Patrols. A very nice dinner, served by the Wood Badge staff, was greatly appreciated. One more presentation was done using the film “Mr. Holland’s Opus” as a background. A wonderful dessert was served. It was then back to Gilwell one more time for the closing ceremony. It was once again quite an emotional time as we walked from staff member to staff member saying our thank you’s to them on the way out. It was now time to say a brief good-bye to everyone until we meet again.

Why I am Pro-Life

Why am I personally pro-life? There are several reasons in several areas. I will freely admit most of them are firmly set in my faith. With the Bible as my guide I see staunchly defending life at all stages is the only way to go. I know there are those who would disagree with me while believing in their position just as much. The debate rages in some ways more at a fever pitch than before with the battles over Health Care Reform. The debate has descended into yelling matches at some meetings.
The first and foremost reason is my own situation. I was born with a form of dwarfism, Turners Syndrome. There are other effects outside of short stature. I won’t go into them, but suffice it to say they have made life challenging. With all the technologies available today many people are making the decision to terminate their pregnancies rather than have a “disabled” child. Yes, there are difficulties and patience is required. There is no doubt on that fact. Not to mention the possible costs of treatment. Very good insurance is essential in these cases. I will always be thankful my parents didn’t take this route which admittedly wasn’t as readily taken back when I came into this world fifty-five years ago. Being small made for some interesting times while growing up for sure. Trying to convince people I was older than I looked was one of them. This lead to many adventures. Believe it or not, I can still get some of the same reaction today even though I am middle aged.
Another reason I am pro-life is the make up of my family. It is interesting to see some of the looks when we go places. Our son is adopted, see my earlier blog of July ninth about his coming into our lives. As adoption is a BIG part of my family is it easy to see why I am pro-life. I have wondered at times what my life would be, or if I would even be in this world, if my grandparents had not brought my father into their lives. There are many couples ready and willing to take these children into their lives. They are willing to start the long, complicated process of adoption to love the children. There are even people adopting children at the very earliest stages of life…as embryos and bringing them into this world. I met one of these “snowflake” children at a Right to Life conference several years ago. I considered it a privilege to meet this precious little boy and his parents.
Let me now go to the other end of the spectrum, the end of life. My views on life were set while I was in high school and college, but thoroughly cemented when my beloved mother-in-law and my mother passed away within a period of about twenty months. My husband’s mother was diagnosed with cancer and left us about four months later. The lessons she taught during that short time period will never leave me. She taught us about leaving a legacy of love and focusing on others even though she knew she was dying. I will always seek to emulate her the rest of my life. There are those who would have advocated her leaving as soon as possible for various reasons but I would argue we would have lost those invaluable lessons taught. Shortly thereafter, the effects of a brain wasting condition caught up with my mother and she collapsed while out with my father to take care of some business. She was finally diagnosed with Older Age Hydrocephalus which had the same effects as Alzheimers disease. The next year and a half she was in and out of responsiveness. She was non-responsive for nine months giving only one or two word answers to questions or shaking or nodding her head. My father was going to leave on a well deserved vacation to see my brother and his family who lived in California at the time. He reminded my mom he was leaving and suddenly she “woke up” wanting to know when he was going to pick her up to go to the airport. This was the beginning of a God given time of reconciling between the two of us. She was so completely changed when she woke up we were able to make up , as much as possible with her brain injury, for a lot of things which had happened in the past. Then finally, we had one last time of singing duets together at a family gathering. My brother’s family had just moved here from California and it was birthday time for a couple of us. After dinner I sat down and started playing the piano. Mom came up and wanted to sing. We did for about half and hour to forty-five minutes until she tired. It was very shortly after this Mom went into her final coma leaving us about a month later. Once again some would have had my mother leave us sooner but the precious time of reconciliation and the last time of making music would have been lost.
I could go on about my reasons for being so thoroughly pro-life, but my biggest thought is only God has the right to determine when we will go home to meet Him. With abortion I think of how many doctors, musicians, or whatever profession have we lost when that tiny life was ended? Have we lost the person who could have found the cure for any one of the horrible diseases in the world? Have we lost the next Yo-Yo Ma to the music world? This is why I am pro-life!!!

It's Wood Badge Time

This was an exhausting, but good weekend. Ter and I spent it up at Gerber Scout Reservation (Camp) beginning our Wood Badge training. The first question would be, “What is Wood Badge?” It is the highest level of adult training in leadership available in Boy Scouts. We had been looking forward to this for a while. Events prevented us from going a couple of years ago so we were determined to make it this time around.
Our adventure began Thursday evening as we decided to get a motel room for the night so we wouldn’t have to get up so early for the long drive knowing it would also be a long first day of training. We stayed at a nice little more of a Mom and Pop type of place for the night, the Bell-Aire. It is a nice, clean comfortable place to lay your head down for the night. The room didn’t have some of the amenities you usually see now such as a coffee pot but it didn’t really matter as we would basically just be getting up, getting dressed and heading out for breakfast at Russ’s just down the road. Neither one of us got much sleep. It was when we were getting ready to leave Ter discovered a “wardrobe malfunction”….it was definitely chilly out and his long uniform pants were at home!!! It was a good thing he brought his long uniform socks to keep his legs at least somewhat warm. Lesson learned, check your uniform before loading the car!! Due to rules complete official BSA uniforms are required for the course. I borrowed a pair of official shorts for training but this weekend they would definitely not be used. I’ll probably have to finally invest in a pair for myself.
A good breakfast and some coffee got us fueled for the start of the day…on to Gerber!!!We arrived and checked in and were assigned our “Den” as we would start training as “Cub Scouts” and later become a Patrol when we “crossed over” and became “Boy Scouts”. Our Patrols are set up by a questionnaire we send in after signing up for the course. We have a diverse group, which is good. We would become pretty good friends by the end of the weekend. The other lady in our group and I shared part of a cabin for the weekend.
We started our training and it was fast paced. The morning went quickly. It had been raining so having rain ponchos handy was the order of the day. After lunch we went down to the beach by the lake where we transitioned to “Boy Scouts” and my group became the Eagle Patrol. One member of the group immediately got the enthusiasm going by making up a Patrol cheer. The training outdoors went pretty quickly as the rain was really beginning to come down. Many activities were moved inside. The rain did let up enough for us to have our tasty supper in a shelter down by the lake. Then it was back to the dining hall for some team building activities. You have to learn to trust the other members of your Patrol during the time of our training and the activities were interesting. The facts you learn about your fellow Patrol members really help you to relate and bond as a group.
Saturday evening was the Wood Badge game show. It was loud and fairly raucous at times for sure. The noise was such that I ended up turning off my hearing aids….which did cost me getting much out of one of the games but I could feel the friendly competition between the Patrols. Earlier there was an activity where each patrol built a rocket out of a couple of pop bottles which we shot off. There was quite a bit of laughter watching the rockets shoot off the “launching” pad. Ter and I ended up shooting off the last round against each other. We were laughing so hard as the fellow running the launches started a cheer as to which of our rockets would go the farthest it was hard to listen for the countdown. Terry’s rocket won, but it was all in fun. We also worked on our menus for weekend two as it is more like an actual campout with us being required to put up a tent, cook our own meals as a Patrol, along with the writing of our “tickets” for the goals we have to reach to earn our position as Wood Badge. It is seen as quite an honor to earn your Wood Badge beads as it shows dedication to Scouting and all it means to the youth of our nation.
Sunday morning was chapel in accordance with the last point of the Scout law, A Scout is Reverent. Then there was time once again to work on our “tickets”. There was one more learning session then we settled in to watch the movie, “October Sky”. We were to watch for various elements of what we had been taught about leadership during the course of the weekend. It was interesting to see how the various elements worked together while viewing it.
After that it was time to go home, take a hot shower, and start to recover and digest all the events of the weekend. In a way it was sad to part as we had bonded pretty well during the brief time of the weekend. We will be working together as things progress. Our Patrol and Wood Badge Course members will become friends for life. Everything we learned this weekend can be used in every situation. I’m sorry to kind of repeat myself, but it is times like this that make Scouting special.

Time For Things to Pick Up Again....

Here it is just past the middle of August. Our schedules will soon be picking up to normal level with activities for Boy Scouts, church, and other things. You like to be busy, but enjoy the halcyon time where days and evenings are not quite so full giving you a little flexibility for doing things spontaneously. Whoever said things slow down once the kids are out of the house must not have had any, in my humble opinion. Our days are just as full, or maybe more, since our son left home for college days. Just different things are there rather than school sports activities.
Our chosen activities are still working with kids. We both are active in Boy Scouts with Ter as a Merit Badge Counselor, Assistant Scoutmaster, and working with training. I am a Unit Commissioner for position but help in training also. A Unit Commissioner is a liaison between their assigned Units (Pack, Troop, or Crew) and the local Council to help troubleshoot problems and keeping up with what is going on within the Units. I have helped with various types of training to help new leaders be the best they can be along with training the boys to lead their Troop and help with Packs. This part really keeps you on your toes as you never know what the boys may come up with as the session goes on. I also work with the kids at church on Wednesday evenings for our AWANA (Approved Workmen Are Not Ashamed) program. The kids have to memorize Bible verses and facts to gain prizes and we always have a time for a story on a Bible theme known as Council Time. My room leader and I had an extremely eager bunch of girls last season which kept us looking forward to each week. There is also time for fun with about a half an hour for games. This time can be pretty raucous with some great competition. This time is also where I may shut off my hearing aids, aka Tune Out Time, but keep my eyes open to what is going on and to encourage the girls as they play their games. There are times I am really thankful NOT to know what the decibel reading is in the fellowship room where we hold opening and game time. You are always thrilled when a child receives Christ as their Savior. That is the TRUE reason for working with these kids, to bring them to a saving knowledge of Christ. These girls have become kind of my surrogate daughters through the years. It has been neat to watch them grow up and mature into fine young ladies.
Choir will also be starting up again. We have a pretty good choir thanks to the hard work of our Director and musicians. Our organist and pianist are mother and daughter with our Director being son and brother. A truly musical family. Our pianist is one of those rare talents who can sit down, look at a piece of music and play it right now. I have only met three people like that in my lifetime. We also have a wonderful husband and wife team who bring string bass, cello, violin and viola to the musical mix. It is not unusual when we do a big program to have some of their students come to make up an orchestra. It is quite a sound to go along with the usual keyboard, guitar, bass guitar and drums. I do really enjoy choir. I usually sing alto, or the lower female voice, but have been known to switch to soprano, or higher voice, when needed. I know the limit of my voice. I am just at times overwhelmed with the musical talent in our church. God has surely blessed us.
I am thankful to be busy and to feel I am contributing to things. As long as God gives me the strength and talent I will be there. My feeling is we should never let our talents go to waste and God has promised each of us has a talent to use for Him. We just have to be willing to be open to His leading and to do what He asks. As my good friend says, “Do it now because you never know when things may be taken away from you.” How true, how true.

Let's Get Back to Basics

I am sitting here mulling over in my mind what is happening in our country. There just seems to be little or no respect for one another anymore. You read almost daily about shootings, beatings, destruction of property, and the list goes on and on. Basic civility seems to have gone out the door. You have to watch what you say and do closely to avoid “dissing” someone or a group of people. One word or phrase rightly interpreted or not can set things off. People have little or no patience for others in many ways. Sometimes it would seem it can be you looked at the other person the wrong way. This is surely a sad situation.
While others may disagree with me, I feel it would not hurt anyone at all to be taught what is known as the “Golden Rule” again. “Do unto other as you would have them do unto you.” Or put in a simpler manner, treat other people as you would like to be treated. Stop and think for a minute before reacting. Most of the time it is better NOT to react immediately to a situation if you have the option. Take a deep breath, step back for a couple of minutes or seconds, do some analyzing of what has happened. Take the time to find out the true facts about things. A lot of trouble could be avoided if more people would do this. The story is told when Abraham Lincoln was angry at someone, he would sit and write a letter, then put it in his desk for a few days. He would then take it out, look at it and most of the time would decide not to send it. He would destroy it. The same principle can apply to e-mails. Write it, put it in your “draft” folder, then later look at it. I have found I virtually always hit “delete” or greatly modify what I have written. I had a time where I hit the wrong button and sent an angry e-mail which I dearly regretted and did apologize. Stopping and thinking can also make you think about the tone of your e-mails. It is impossible to know the true emotion of the writer during an e-mail. In many ways more face to face communication is needed again.
You watch our leaders at times and if someone disagrees with them, it is smear them. They have people who look for “dirt” to use against those who disagree. This is not limited to one party. Both are guilty. The mud flinging is not becoming to anyone, and it sure would be nice if our leaders would conduct themselves in accordance with a higher standard. This slinging party is even during the primaries when we choose who will run for a position. So this is not limited to members of the opposition party but those in their own party. It is not unusual for things to be used from 20, 30, even forty or more years ago to bring out against someone. Will someone please be a grown up here!!!
I worry about our young people in this way. If someone is being teased or the like it is so much harder for them to get away from it nowadays. With texting, Instant message, et all the person cannot get away from the harassment. The only way to avoid it is to not do any thing which is related to these things which is unthinkable to a teenager these days. In this way all the new technology is not all good. You can be the subject of all this but not know who is doing it unless you happen to know their on screen name or identity. It certainly adds to the boldness to go after someone because of the anonymity. Unfortunately some people really get their “jollies” or “kicks” out of doing things like this. I went through more than my fair share of teasing and the like when in school but at least I could come home and pretty much get away from it. People didn’t call me at home.
The only way to turn this around, in my mind, is to begin to teach respect for other people from a very early age. Perhaps there are some who would object because the concept is found in the Bible, Matthew 7:12. “Therefore all things whatsoever ye would that men should do to you, do ye even so to them: for this is the law and the prophets.” This is yet another sensitive point with some people. Don’t bring up anything which is even remotely related to religion or the Bible. Please, people, calm down a little bit. The “Golden Rule” is a concept which can be taught without thinking religion is somehow being “forced down your throat.” This is just basic civility and treating other people correctly. We need to start getting down to basics again. It needs to begin at home with the parents. Begin to teach basic etiquette, treatment of others, and rules. We all need to keep those in mind.

I'm ready!!

I am pretty excited as this week ends. I finished making arrangements yesterday to attend a Christian writer’s conference in Grand Haven the middle of October. It is called the “Breathe” conference. It is a gathering of writers both established and getting their feet wet. I attended last year and it was a good time. You get to meet authors who have many books under their belt. They have been through the process of getting their works published.
Last year I was impressed with the willingness of the workshop teachers to share both the ups and downs of what they had been through. Also what it takes to stick with it to get a publisher to take on your book or other form of writing and promoting once it is in print. As with anything you have to be willing to work hard and long to persevere for your writing to be noticed. They did not sugarcoat the facts and told stories of miscues which brought embarrassing moments, now seen as humorous. You have to be willing to put yourself out in public. One of my most favorite times was when one of the authors graciously allowed us on his sailing boat for one of the workshops. It was so relaxing to feel the gentle motion of the boat even as it was docked and drink in the sights and sounds.
There were workshops on many things including how to set up your writing area, using your five senses for bringing life into a story, writing ads or other promotional material, or writing for different genres such as magazines. Don’t be afraid to ask questions was a very important point made at each session. There was advice for working with your editors once you have been noticed. The steps to getting from words on your processor to printed page are many with numerous people involved.
The setting for the conference last year was a church very close to the channel in Grand Haven which leads into Lake Michigan. Grand Haven is a beautiful city right on the lake and the church building seemed to have an interesting history. It looked like it had been a factory before becoming a church. In looking at pictures displayed I wondered if it had been a place where pianos had been built. I understand some good quality pianos were built in our area in years past.
This conference looks to have a good line up for both speakers and workshops. It is a full two days of hands on learning. It is also a great lesson learned about how the authors are extremely gracious to all who are in attendance. Have a listening ear and a kind heart.
All in all an up end to a week which has had so many ups and downs it looks like an EKG heart test readout. It has been a very busy week with picking up some of the chores around the house while Ter puts in overtime to finish a project. It has been interesting to note how some of the parts of the jobs I used to not mind now are much more difficult for me. I got them done and Ter doesn’t have to worry about them which is the important part. I am getting tired and hope the overtime doesn’t last much longer….the extra time worked isn’t reflected in a bigger paycheck. Thank God for the paycheck, though, as so many here in Michigan are hurting so badly. I keep praying for a turn around. We are loosing a lot of people who are moving out of state to find work. As the Bible directs, I pray for our leaders at all levels for their wisdom and leadership in this extremely difficult time. It is so comforting to have the realization that God is in control even during these times.

Music and Trains...what a weekend!

This was another full weekend, but a really good one. Friday evening we went to a local coffee shop which just opened in May, Kava Klatsch. They have music every each Friday giving local talent a stage to show their stuff. This week it was gospel bluegrass. A group of five gentlemen did a really nice job for a couple of hours of fine listening. I really enjoyed the old time, toe tapping , southern gospel style numbers they did. I also learned someone whom I know from way back is a very good musician playing the pounded dulcimer (a pretty neat instrument) and autoharp. I don’t know if Ter was really planning to, but we stayed through the very last number. The music was running through my head the rest of the evening. We will keep a watch on who is appearing in the coming weeks. I also highly recommend the sandwiches and drinks at Kava Klatsch…here’s a plug for you, Wayne and Kenda!!!
It was up early the next morning as we were planning on going to the big train festival over in Owosso, MI. Joining us for the trip would be our very energetic ten year old neighbor, Peter. We got off a little late, but the trip there went smoothly. We parked the car and quickly decided to walk the three blocks to the festival area. The crowd was already pretty large as we entered. It was a pretty impressive sight with all the steam locomotives with their boilers running even though they weren’t moving. The trains had gone through some very extensive, loving restoration and the jobs had been beautifully done. The one which jumped out at me the most was “Leviathan” an engine which evoked thoughts of when the railroad was the most common mode of transportation in this country perhaps in the late 19th century. The fact was “Leviathan” happened to be the newest train on display having been built around ten years ago. It is painted bright red for the major part of the body with wood and black trim. It is certainly hard to miss with the bright paint job. Another train with a bright paint job was the “Daylight” built in the 1940’s and used in passenger service. This was painted in vibrant shades of orange and red making one think of sunrises. It had a long, sleek design. There were similarly painted passenger cars also on display. I wondered how many people made long trips in the cars pulled by this train. I have been on one kind of long train ride from Grand Rapids to Chicago where we caught our flight to California when we went on vacation and I really enjoyed it.
There were several model railroad sets around, too. One tent had four different layouts on display. The most unique was one made completely out of Lego, even the engines. The buildings were very impressive with a couple of them being approximately two to two and a half feet high. I was amazed at the detail in various parts of the set up. While we were in the tent the crowd grew to where you could hardly move…something I can have problems handling. Ter noticed and we did get outside to where the crowd was a little thinner. We went on to other exhibits and looked around. I told Ter I could handle going back to the tent to finish seeing the set ups after a little break. We wolfed down our lunches which we had packed and kept looking around. We were in the museum building when the skies opened up so we looked around for a little while until the rain let up. I was glad to get outside again with the crowd inside.
We did go back to the layout tent and finish up our touring there. Peter had a blast taking picture after picture. The rain started again but this time we ducked out of the tent over to a building where a train seems to be in the early phases of restoration. Looking around one could appreciate the hours and hours of work which goes into putting these great engines back on the tracks to be appreciated by rail fans all over the country. You could feel the enthusiasm even though it was raining.
The exhibit I feel I must really bring out was the bunk (a specific type of car) railroad car which has been restored by a young man from over near Detroit as his Eagle Scout project. This is one of the final and biggest parts of earning the highest rank in Boy Scouts. The Eagle candidate must do a project which will benefit the community and lead fellow Scouts and other volunteers in the completion of it to show their leadership skills. I have been privileged to work on several of these projects and watched these young men earn this coveted rank. The car was in very poor shape when work started and the hours of work and the materials which the young man must have gotten donated are extremely impressive. We both wished this highly motivated youth much luck in earning his rank.
All in all it was a very good day and a little boy had a great time. You can go with us again any time, Peter!! And….thank you Lord for helping me keep my “get me out of here” feelings under control for his sake.

Moving On In Life

We finished up yesterday doing what is becoming a big tradition in many places. We had a big sale in one of our out buildings. After a couple of years of discussing it we finally took action. It was a decision to begin downsizing. Our son is happily married and living in Tennessee. Our house is just huge for two of us. The upstairs was filled with a lot of clutter and it was time to see if some of our “junk is another persons treasure” as the saying goes. We went through things and if it hadn’t been touched in a long time, it was labeled to go.
Yes, there were memories with a lot of the things. Our son’s stroller and swing chair brought back happy memories of his younger years. Pat and I put many miles on the wheels of his “carriage” walking around the west side of Grand Rapids where we lived at that time. Once he started to walk the stroller wasn’t as happy a place for him. That didn’t go in the sale but we hope to find a happy home for it with someone else to have good times with their child. A lamp table that was my parents went very quickly. It was in the living room for many, many years. An early model digital camera which took pictures at our sons wedding went. Thanks to it we had immediate pictures of the happy day. Model train equipment also sold. Books which were read a long time ago went to new readers to hopefully enjoy. People also inquired about the history of the building we were using as it is a pretty unusual one in this day and age. It is a quonset (kind of half rounded) shaped building which was put up shortly after World War II and has served well ever since holding our farming equipment and now housing our storage business. In recounting the history many happy memories of growing up came back. It wasn’t an easy life on the farm, but we really had our happy times and it supported us fairly well financially. However there does come a time where you need to let go and move on to a “new season” in your life. It turned out to be a pretty good decision.
I went out to begin the sale on Friday morning not really expecting much action as we definitely live in a rural area. I took plenty of entertainment with me to pass the time. Boy, was I wrong! There was a gentleman waiting for me to open up. My husband told me he had already spoken to another person who wondered if we had any antiques. I’m sure there are some in the house, but a number of them I didn’t want to part with as they were my grandparents, family heirlooms. I took the plastic off the tables as he was looking around. I made my first sale about ten minutes into the day. The second sale was shortly after that. It was a steady stream of cars pulling in all morning and it was very heartening to see. I was busy all morning and things were going well. My husband, who was inside completing his work week at his home office, came out to give me a break around noon. I told him, “We’re going to have to bring more stuff out of the house to make this sale go for two days the way things are going.” We started thinking of more things to haul out. We considered this a good problem to have.
Filling out the designated portion of the building with sale items became less of a problem a little while later. Our neighbors came over to visit and I said something about we’d have to bring more stuff out of the house. They went home and shortly thereafter came over with a large trailer filled with things to add to the sale. We quickly became a two family sale. The building really began to fill out. We scrambled to find room to display the “treasures”. Things were kind of all over the place. Even at that items did keep going out. This also gave company for running the sale which was a good thing, too. Things began to bustle. We ended up staying open later than planned as more people stopped in to look. We shut down for the day at about six o’clock. More things did come out of the house that evening as we did more sorting. It was a very successful first day.
We opened up for the second day. Things started out slower as far as people dropping by. It was an off and on stream throughout the day. The nicest things went pretty quickly. A little later another family friend stopped by and added a few more things to the sale. Ter's Dad came out bringing a few things to the mix. The sale shut down shortly after five as planned. Our neighbors brought their trailer back over and what was left over was loaded to go to the local Good Will donation area. The building is now pretty empty again and we will finish cleaning up during the coming week. A tiring time but our mission was accomplished. Get rid of things, make a little money in the process, and the rest hopefully going to help others. Will we do it again? Probably, as this one went pretty well. We ascertained more of what people might be looking for. We also learned more of the work involved in a sale the size we had. Could we have made more? Perhaps. We sold things fairly dirt cheap. The point wasn’t to profit heavily. It was to price so the things would move. It definitely was a time of letting go and trying to move on to a new phase in life and I am glad we did it.

The Adoption Option

In different events going on the past few weeks, I neglected to write about a big event in our family life last month. June eighteenth our son Patrick turned twenty five years old. He was born four months before we actually met him as he is from Seoul, South Korea. It hardly seems possible it has been that long. Adoption has played a big role on my side of the family.
It all started with my father, Walt Wingeier. He was adopted by my grandparents, Alex and Edwina Wingeier, very shortly after birth. A few years later they adopted my Uncle Clare. I never suspected adoption played a role in the family until my other grandmother slipped and said something about it one day when I was middle school age. I really don’t know why the fact of the adoption was kept so quiet. Of course this lead to questioning my mother when I got home and it was confirmed. It didn’t make a difference in any of the relationships in the family. Grandpa and Grandma were still just that, Daddy was still Daddy. I later found out at least one of my cousins was adopted. It didn’t make a difference, they were still my cousins. Nothing would change any of this and the love was still there. There are other members of my family who are also adopted. My step-mother once commented she had married into the most adopting family when she married Daddy.
We knew when we married in 1980 having our own children was not an option. Once my diagnosis of Turners Syndrome came down when I was eighteen the deal was pretty much sealed. Now, with the advent of new technologies, it is possible for Turners ladies to have children but the risk involved has to weigh in on the decision. It is deemed a high risk pregnancy by doctors due to small stature. That along with the expense involved in going the “in vitro” route for children can make it a difficult decision. Terry and I decided before we even walked down the aisle adoption was going to be the way our family would be built. I will always be thankful this fact wasn’t a deal buster for our engagement. I will always be thankful for my beloved late mother in law for helping in this matter.
It was after three years of marriage we decided to begin checking into adoption options. I made several calls to agencies about domestic adoption. We weren’t even able to get on to any waiting lists at that time, at least for infants. We began to check into foreign adoptions. We finally settled on going through Bethany Christian Services here in Grand Rapids. We attended an informational meeting in Muskegon, Michigan on a cold, blustery winter day. We walked around and looked at the information but I think mostly at the pictures of the children who were waiting in orphanages or who had come home to their families here in the states. After leaving the meeting our decision was sealed to go ahead with things. Thus began this part of the journey to Patrick joining our family.
We made out the preliminary application and were assigned a social worker. We began our home study for them to determine if we would be fit parents. It was supposed to be four meetings with two of them with us together and then each of us alone with the social worker. Things were going smoothly until the last meeting. We walked in expecting things to be pretty much done as far as being approved by the agency. Not so fast!! Our social worker informed us an anonymous phone call had come to the domestic part of the Bethany agency attempting to turn us both in as child abusers. They had said everything an agency wouldn’t want to hear about us during the phone call. The party speaking kept using the phrase, “My friend says”, during the litany of accusations so the Bethany person asked to speak directly to the accuser. This quickly ended the phone call when the speaker said, “My friend says I’ve talked too long”, and promptly hung up. Due to the nature of the call the agency didn’t really put a whole lot of credence in it but we still had to be more thoroughly checked out by the agency which of course added a lot of stress. We finally finished our home study and began our wait to hear about the child who would become ours. I still have mixed feelings about anonymous phone calls to agencies to this day. There are still times I shiver to think how close we came to having things stopped in their tracks. We thank God this didn’t torpedo things before they really began. He was good to us through everything.
We had been told not to expect any action on an assignment until around November of 1984. The call came in early September!!! Would we like to adopt a little boy? Are you kidding?! We met with the social worker to see pictures of OUR SON. He became ours immediately when we saw the pictures from the orphanage. You think we were on Cloud Nine? You better believe it!! Things moved quickly and we met our son at Detroit Metro Airport in late October 1984. This was also quicker than expected. We still talk about meeting the “Silver Stork” that morning. Our journey of parenting began at the moment they placed Pat in my arms along with forgiveness to the person who tried to put a stop to this intimate moment.
Would I recommend adoption? You bet! Is parenting a child biologically not your own easy? Is raising any child easy? We have had the same ups and downs of any parent the past twenty five years. Were there moments we wanted to commit murder? Thank God we didn’t. Patrick has matured into a fine young man who has a beautiful wife. They have both made us very proud and we love them very much. Our family has been built on love and adoption from way back. Thank God for it.

Pickin' and grinnin' fun

The past year and a half Terry and I have been working on a new hobby….bluegrass music. We have both fallen in love with it. It all started simply enough when our neighbors gave Terry a banjo. It needed some work like fixing where the neck meets the body of the banjo where a small shim had been placed along with a new head (banjo heads are a lot like drum heads) and new strings. After doing the repairs he has talked about becoming a luthier, a person who repairs string instruments, after he retires from what he does now. He finished all the work and then began learning how to pick some songs. In learning any instrument the main thing is practicing the same note, timing, and phrasing over and over. Even though being somewhat of a musician myself and knowing the importance of practice, the repetition can be somewhat irritating. This is where being hard of hearing can be kind of a blessing in disguise. Tune out time (turn off the hearing aids) for a little while so they can do what they must do to improve their skills. You also get the opportunity to congratulate and encourage as things get better and better. Terry is really getting pretty good with his picking. Guess it’s listening to all the bluegrass CD’s while he’s working. However, it is always interesting to find out what he is listening to as I walk by his office during the days he works at home. It isn’t always bluegrass. Sometimes it is country, classic rock, or on occasion classical.
Terry was given the banjo in about October or November a couple of years ago. We fairly shortly began discussing an acoustic instrument for me. I knew my hands are too small for a regular size guitar. It wasn’t until later I found out you can get smaller sizes. With my hearing the violin, better known in the bluegrass world as the fiddle, would be pretty difficult. So the mandolin seemed like a good choice. We began to research various makes and styles along with prices. Like most things you can spend as much as you would like on your instrument. Prices ranged from under $100 to the limited edition, hand made “Ricky Skaggs” signature model made by Gibson priced at 20 to 25 thousand dollars. Even knowing Mr. Skaggs himself had tested the instrument before being released for sale the price was more than I would expect to part with. Unless I suddenly become really, really wealthy or a great professional player. I hadn’t really known a particular model had been settled on until Terry came home one night with an odd shaped box from a really great store in Lansing, MI, Elderly Instruments. It is a very nice instrument, particularly to start with. It has a cool model name, Rover, so I am completely satisfied. It's sure easier to haul around than a piano or organ!! I opened it up and my adventure into a new form of music began.
It has been interesting learning to read a different type of music than I am used to from knowing piano and organ or clarinet in my younger days. Also learning the mandolin can be the instrument keeping time for the group while playing chords. You don’t always have a bass in the group. We have also met great people through the local bluegrass association. They are very encouraging and helpful with their advice. I have finally gotten brave enough to do a little actual picking at the slow jams. Being a large group it can be a little difficult for me to pick up on various things but I try my best and I am slowly getting better. I prefer smaller groups where you can really hear each other. I have also enjoyed the workshops at the two festivals held by the association during the year at our local youth fairgrounds. I have enjoyed the most catching up with a couple of friends of ours who have their own band and go around making music. We have sat in with them a few times and had a lot of fun. My favorite times have been when we have appeared with them at our local Veterans Facility. This is a place where people who have bravely served our country can live when no longer able to live at home. They are always an appreciative audience and we enjoy getting to talk to some of them to get to know them better.
Right now my skills are fairly simple but I work hard to improve. I have to remind myself that it all takes time and the main thing is having fun while you learn.

Relay time is here!

This is another busy weekend, but for such a good cause. It is Relay for Life weekend in Lowell and both Terry and I participate. I regret I had to miss the last few steering committee meetings but I had already been working with the kids at church on Wednesday evening for AWANA all season and felt an obligation to finish up. It will be interesting to see how Relay does this year with how hard our area has been hit in this economic downturn. I know we are down in team numbers, but hopefully not walkers. I know the enthusiasm will be there as always. It never ceases to amaze me how many people are cancer survivors, caregivers, or friends or relatives of people who are battling or have survived a cancer diagnosis.
Our involvement began three years ago after Terry had been through his treatment and had just been told he was in remission. We did some walking that year. The next year our church team began which was named “Beautiful Feet.” It was an enthusiastic, eclectic group of people who gathered to team walk the 24 hours. I must digress here to explain more about how Relay works. It is an event through the American Cancer Society where teams of people join together and the teams attempt to have at least one person walking the course set up or the athletic track for a 24 hour period.These walkers try to elicit donations for their endeavor. People can sign up to walk for one of the hours or more to help reach this goal. During this time the teams have various things they are also doing to raise monies to go for cancer research and support. Lowell has usually done very well really taking the cause to heart. The teams sell things, have games to play, or offer various services. One team has offered therapeutic massages while others have sold food, with the things being very creative they have thought up. Our team has sisters who have graciously come the past two years to make balloon animals and other things which go over well with the children…and even some adults. We are grateful they have offered their services again this year. Their mother usually comes to walk. There is a lot of excitement throughout the whole thing.
There are celebrations for the cancer survivors which include a delicious supper served for the survivors and their caregivers. This is followed by the Survivors Lap where the survivors walk around the track and are met half way through by their caregiver to complete it. This is to acknowledge not only the people who have been through cancer but the people who were there for them during that time. There is also a time to remember those who have lost their battle and honor them. You can buy paper bags called luminaria which you decorate to honor those people or those who are in time of their treatment or who are in remission. At dusk sand and candles are placed in these bags, the candles are lit and the lights to the track are turned off. It is a very moving experience to see the track almost solid with these bags lighting the way for those who are walking. You can usually hear a pin drop during this ceremony.
There is also entertainment during Relay. Music, games, also a silent auction are scheduled. It is always interesting to see what is donated for this portion of the Relay. We have been privileged to help out the past couple of Saturday mornings of Relay to join with some friends to make music. It is a fun time with joking around, doing some singing and just trying to help liven things up a bit while the event is beginning to wind down. Two good friends of ours have come down for this part of the event which adds to the fun. To get to see them, have some fun, and then perhaps go out to lunch makes for a good time.
All good things must come to an end as the old saying goes. The last half hour is the closing ceremony where the awards are given out for raising the most money. We did pretty well last year in that department. I hope we do this year. Then it is time to go home, recover and then begin plans for next year. The battle against this horrible disease never stops. Too many of our friends, family, and others have been down the road this brings.

Thoughts on growing older

This week I completed the biggest part of my annual doctor check ups. It was a little interesting when I realized most of them were scheduled for the same week. It has been a busy time since our return from Nashville with meetings (who said things would slow down once your kid(s) were out of the house?), preparations for other events and finally the doctors. I look at the list of numbers in my phone thinking, “Gee, when did the entries for doctors begin to catch up with the ones for friends and family?” The list has gotten longer as I have aged along with the fact so many of them are specialists. You have a doctor for each specific thing, eyes, hearing, back, specific conditions like diabetes, along with everything else. Gone are the days where you went to one well known to you doctor. I have mixed feelings as you realize in specializing the doctor has all the up to date information for their area but it was nice to have one trusted person for your medical needs.
Whoever said, “Growing old(er) isn’t for sissies”, pretty much hit the nail on the head. I have found particularly in the years since hitting forty this is true. It has been a goodly number of years since I hit that plateau (Oh man, am I dating myself here). The number of pills taken has slowly grown with each diagnosis. You realize the purposes of each one and are thankful for them but wish you could lower the number. Then, you kind of begin to wax poetic back to your younger years….
I used to be able to eat pretty much what I wanted, although I tried to limit it because of a constant battle with my weight. Second servings are NOT allowed anymore. Now it is controlled amounts of things for various reasons. Gone are the days when I jogged a couple of miles every night as my body would scream in protest if I tried it now. Walking is fine for me. Rougher sports like basketball and softball are for watching for the same reason. Glasses are absolutely essential now, with bifocals added, especially for reading or seeing smaller objects. But the thing I think about most often is the fact I try to get out of climbing for things now…it didn’t bother me in years past. I’d just grab the kitchen stool or inside ladder and have at it. In fact, in my childhood years I used to get in trouble for pulling out the kitchen drawers and climbing up them to answer our phone which was on the wall. I saw it as trying to help, but Mom had other thoughts! I have a “grabber” now to help me get things off the higher shelves. I never let much slow me down, still don’t for the most part, but put more thought into it nowadays.
Lest one think I see things in a morbid way that is definitely NOT the case. In being forced to slow down it has given time to think about the blessings given by God. Each day is a gift from Him to be cherished. The time is used to give more thought to his Word, the Bible, and using the time to pray for others. Seeing things through a different eye with our life experiences is really a blessing. The simple things mean more like hearing the birds once I have my hearing aids in for the day, yet another sign of growing older, along with looking out over the fields on our farm. Wait a minute, there is another change!! A goodly share of the farm has been sold after many years in the family. But still there is still much to be thankful for in life. You find different ways to serve Him. Just keep an open mind to His leading!

Thoughts on Nashville

It has been three weeks since we left for our trip to Nashville. I am always eager as it is a time to reconnect with our loved ones and friends who live in the area. I have fallen in love with the rolling hills, history, and the sights and sounds. We usually plan for one big thing while we are there as it does have its “touristy” type things which are definitely expensive. So far we have been to the Country Music Hall of Fame, the Charlie Daniels museum and store, along with perennial favorite the Ernest Tubb Record shop. The city has its own feel and flavors. It isn’t all country music as we discovered on our first trip. There is a Nashville Hard Rock Café, although it does have exhibits for country stars. It is loud and raucous as one would expect. We have found some very interesting restaurants both downtown and the surrounding area. We had a wonderful pulled BBQ pork lunch from a little kind of hole in the wall place near our son and daughter in laws house. I even allowed myself some of their wonderful homemade pie! We’ll definitely make a return trip.
This trip was made interesting by a couple of different things. One, a lesson learned when we stopped in Dayton, Ohio for the night at a pretty nice hotel. We got our things in the room and I placed two of my bags in an out of the way spot to prevent tripping over them….that ended up being a mistake. When I left the room I picked up the top one of the two bags and neglected the bottom one which had my music supplies in it. This included the tuner for my mandolin, music, music stand and a couple of other things. We pulled out of Dayton and down the road we went. It hit me about an hour later, “Yikes, I think I left my stuff at the hotel!!!” When we stopped for gas my fears were confirmed. Oh great!!! I immediately called the hotel (one of the good things about cell phones. You can handle things quickly). The lady informed me they had found it and she was waiting on a phone call from someone and she would call me back. Ok, I can handle that. I waited two days and never received a call. This lead to three more calls to the hotel with the same results during the week. Frustration was growing with not getting a straight answer out of anybody. The line was always, “Give me your number and I’ll call you back.” I began resigning myself to the fact I would have to replace the lost things. Also to wondering about what could seem a lack of service when we would be paying the shipping costs to get the things back along with the fact I called the facility immediately. I know, I know I was the one who was lax in not checking the room a third time before going to the car. The self inflicted trip to the woodshed has definitely taken hold with this sometimes addle brained, middle aged lady. Check the room a third and even fourth time if necessary before you leave!! I did finally get my bag back. I found a five AM voice mail on my cell phone saying they had found my bag. I quickly called back and arranged for the shipping back here. It has arrived and everything was in good shape, for which I am extremely grateful.
The second thing was a wonderful trip to the Grand Ole Opry!! We had been going kind of back and forth about buying tickets as they aren’t the cheapest. I had read Steve Martin, the comedian, who happens to be a world class banjo player would be making his debut at the Opry while we were there. We had not purchased tickets before we left as we were still discussing the costs. When we arrived Pat and Myla gave us a coupon to get tickets BOGO (buy one, get one free) to attend the evening of music. THANK YOU, dear ones!! We had supper at Opry Mills Mall which is right by the Opry itself and I got some walking in before the show. We arrived at the hall about half an hour before the scheduled beginning time…which was good with the way the hall filled up. We found out later both the shows that evening had sold out so I really felt blessed getting tickets when we didn’t purchase them until two days before the event. I was just drinking in the sights of the auditorium when all of a sudden I heard a loud “How-dee!!” I about jumped out of my seat having a heart attack when I realized a young lady had come out dressed as the late country star Minnie Pearl. While doing kind of a comedy routine she went over the etiquette of being at a live radio show and the rules such as “no smoking”. Then the show itself started with eighty-eight year old “Little” Jimmy Dickens as the host for the first half hour. He really wowed the crowd. He could out sing some of the younger singers of today, in my humble opinion. If the Lord allows me to make it to eighty-eight I hope I still have a singing voice as good as his. You also realized why he is called “Little” Jimmy as he is four feet eleven inches tall, hence the reason he wears the tall cowboy hats when on stage. The evening went on with Marty Stuart, Vince Gill, Amy Grant along with others. Vince Gill introduced Steve Martin and the place went bonkers!! At the Opry you are allowed to get right up to the edge of the stage to take pictures so the area was absolutely packed. I sat back and marveled at the talent of this man. I would have never dreamed he was such a fine musician. It makes me glad I put out the money for the limited edition of his first album which is just coming out. I was also glad for Ter’s patience as that particular edition is taking longer to come out than the regular length one. It is a late arriving part of his anniversary present. I hope he likes it, but I think he will. God really worked things out in allowing us to attend this not soon forgotten evening. I don’t know about Ter, but it really took me a while to settle down to sleep after all of the excitement. I thought about buying a cowgirl hat, pretty light blue with beading in the front. Then I realized the Opry shop only had one size...LARGE. Can you say the hat will be down over your eyes? I settled for a necklace with a treble clef symbol on it (looks kind of like a backward ampersand, for those who don’t read music). We killed a little time while waiting for the traffic to thin out a little and headed home. We turned on the radio station which broadcasts the Opry to listen to the second show on the way home as it was different from the first. This ended a really memorable evening. Would I go again? In a heartbeat!!